5 Phrases Not To Say To Your Spouse


Do you say things to your spouse that you don’t mean to say when your temper flares? Certain hurtful phrases could have an impact on your relationship if you’re not careful with what you say especially during arguments or disagreements. As you know, words are powerful, and taking time to think before saying phrases out of anger could help you avoid many troubles in your married life.

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If you intend to put some effort into nurturing your marital relationship and working toward a balanced life, put your phone down, turn off screens, and find time to work on togetherness in your married life rather than fighting to have your way and not reaching an agreement at any point. Although disagreements between partners are common, when handled right, they can lead to a positive outcome with better decisions and get you closer to each other, building trust and respect. However, using the wrong phrase and losing self-control could lead to a simple disagreement ending up in misunderstandings and regrets.

Here are the phrases you shouldn’t say to your spouse

I wish I had never married you

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Disagreeing on things, doesn’t mean you married the wrong person. Know that God has planned this path for you and your spouse and he has a greater purpose in your marriage. For your marriage to thrive, efforts to strengthen the bond are needed, by both partners in simple ways such as spending quality time together, being considerate, and most importantly praying together at least once a day.

Do not regret being married to your spouse, rather identify the cause for disagreements and work on them together keeping the best interest in mind. To achieve this, both need to set some time aside for communication and cultivate patience, which will keep you from regretting one of the most important blessings in life.

If you’re looking for ways to have quality time with family and strengthen your family bonds, this video is for you:

What keeps families together?

I hate you

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You don’t need to say something aggressive as soon as you’re upset. ‘Hate’ is not the word to say to your spouse even when you’re disturbed or angry. You could phrase your emotions or opinions constructively and let your partner know how you feel in the moment without using the word ‘hate’.

When you do not guard your tongue and say something out of an angry impulse, your relationship gets damaged. The outcome of impulsive reactions is not positive usually and one could end up with regrets and frustration after such actions.

To understand your emotions better and know how not to react, this article on emotions could be helpful:

Accept your emotions.

You’re a bad parent

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Criticizing your spouse’s parenting skills is not the right way to address parenting disagreements. Instead, find time to communicate openly with your spouse if you disagree with his or her parenting style. Such discussions can help you share your views and reach a mutual decision beneficial to the whole family. This strengthens your spousal bond and helps your kids obtain guidance from both parents.

Parenting disagreements are common and should be addressed by keeping cool and being clear about your intentions and viewpoints. Do not argue when kids are around, rather find some time to have a conversation behind closed doors, to share what you feel and your opinion as well as to understand that of your spouse.

Here is an informative and useful article if you’re looking for advice on parenting disagreement between spouses:

Handling parenting disagreements

Shut up

shut up
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When your spouse says something that doesn’t make sense to you, especially when you are in a serious discussion, bear in mind, that ‘shut up’ is never to be said, no matter how silly your partner may sound. There are ways to let your spouse know that you are not okay with what he or she is saying. Put it in simple, and calm words such as ‘I do not agree with it’ or ‘I have a different opinion’.

Use constructive criticism and help your spouse understand what you think in the moment instead of trying to silence him or her with a harsh word. Saying shut up shows that you do not value what the other person says and you are not open to any conversation with the person. Treating your spouse this way could lead to hurtful feelings and damage your relationship over time.

Does anger control your judgment and keep you from being polite to your partner? This article could help you not to let your anger influence your relationship negatively. Does anger control you?

I’m done

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Saying ‘I’m done’ unless you truly mean to leave the relationship can be manipulative and dangerous. It could break trust and show that you are condemning your partner.

It’s right to let your husband/wife know when you’re not happy. However, it should be done in a way that doesn’t damage your marriage, rather be polite and clear about what bothers you. Allow your spouse to respond and have a clear and concise discussion with input from both partners.

‘I’m done’ is a phrase that keeps you from working on your relationship and creates distance between you and your spouse. Avoid saying it and use words that help resolve the conflict, help you explain what you’re going through, and get your message right.

A healthy marriage needs some efforts and adjustments from both partners, and this is an ongoing process where both spouses contribute toward strengthening the bond and getting to know each other better with each passing day. Do not let your emotions control you. Rather, be wise with what you say and make time to listen and understand as well.

There are no perfect people, but striving every day to learn from one’s mistakes and build stronger bonds leads to better relationships and strengthens one’s credibility.

How do you think saying the wrong phrases impacts marital relationship? Do share your thoughts in the comments.

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